Summer is Here and so is more pain!

We are enjoying a cool front right now..last week it was in the upper 90's all week. My hubby had long pants and a sweatshirt on yesterday! It was cloudy and very breezy, but today it's warm and sunny!

 I am very sesitive to the baraometer so when it's hot and humid my body feels like it was hit by a ton of bricks! My joints feel like they are swollen but they aren't, I have no energy to speak of, I could sleep for 10 hrs and still feel tired! The pain I can live with..I have for almost 25 years now..the exhaustion wears me out! I hate that no matter how long I sleep I still feel like I could sleep longer! I hate telling my kids no when they want to do something and I have no energy to do it with them.. I hate that I have to "manage" my energy because once it's gone..it's gone and it takes me days to recover when I do too much. I hate the mental fog that is prevalent most days..It takes me a while to find the words I want to say, especially when I am trying to explain something! It's very frustrating!!
The hardest thing about having Fibromyalgia is that you look "normal" on the outside, but on the inside you are not! I hate that people don't understand that jsut because you look fine doesn't mean you are having a good day!
My daughter told me that someone who will remain nameless called me lazy! Lazy I am not! There are days that I can't do anything but there are also days that I do more then my fair share!
I am grateful for my husband who understands to a point. I don't think he knows truly what my day is like because I push myself to do the things I need to do. I try not to complain, I put a smile on my face and I go on. What else am I suppose to do?? I am the back bone to my family! I do everything!! I don't know any other way. I have lived with Lyme Disease and Fibromyalgia for 25 years now. I don't know what it's like to not to hurt, to have energy to spare, to be able to sleep restfully, to be able to think clearly. This is the way it is..regardless of how I think about it!
I've had to give up an 18 year career in EMS because of the pain and the weakness I have all the time now. I can no longer carry a stretcher or a stair chair..I feel that it was in the best interest of my health and safety that I give it up..I hate that I have!! I loved the Rescue Squad so much but I knew in my heart that I needed to stop! Since we have moved to WV I can't work anyway with my NJ cert. I have found a new career which I have had a passion about for 10 years now! I am a scrapbook instructor for Michaels and for a private store. I LOVE it!!

When God closes a door He always opens another..I know for a fact that he does!!

Happy Mother's Day!

This is a letter that Faith wrote me for Mother's Day!
She told me that she loves me because I am creative and makes things for her!

How cool is my kid?? LOL

Rest easy..

Tonight at 11:00pm I turned on the news to learn that Osama Bin laden was killed by US troops. To all the men and women who perished on September 11, 20011 by his hand may all of you rest in peace!

More to follow..
UPDATE 5/8/2011
It's been a week since we learned the news of Bin Laden's death. Every day the news has something on about it. I feel relief that he was finally caught and though I don't believe that we should take a life unneccessarily, I believe that the right thing was carried out! There are news reports that he used one of his wives as a human shield! How pitiful is that!!
The Taliban are now saying they are going to revolt against Obama and the US..Should this deter us in our war against evil on our own country? No, but I think as a country we must stand tall and not back down! We are trying to better the World against terriorism and give our children a better place to live!

Happy Birthday my Love!!

Today is my husband's birthday!! He is 42 today and does not like me to fuss about his birthday. I made a cake for him today so that the girls could sing him happy birthday. So while he was washing dishes cause (he didn't want to stop) we sang happy Birthday!
We will be married 10 years in November and i can hardly believe that it's been that long!! We have changed and grown alot in those 10 years and I pray that our life together is a long and happy one.

Happy Birthday My Love!! I love you with every beat of my heart. I know that our road has been rough but it has made our love all the stronger!

Where has the time gone??

Hello All,

I cna't believe it's April and I hate to admit that I still have some of my christmas decorations up! LOL It's been a rough couple of months. I have been sick and the kids have been sick and it seems that not a week has gone by that someone has not been feeling well. Emilee was recently hospitalized for 4 days for severe dehydration from vomiting and strep. The vomiting started the week before and was once daily. Then it progressed. It also turns out that part of the problem was gastric reflux which she had a problem with when she was a baby. The Docs in the ER and hospital thought it was just from the strep but after treatment for the strep the vomiting continued. After 3 days at home we went back to the Dr. and she thought it was either post nasal drip form allergies or the gastric reflux. She's doing better now, she stopped vomiting a few days ago after giving her some kids pepto. I am going to give her the Prilosec until it's gone just to be sure.
It's been a very scary few weeks not knowing why she was so sick. Mother's intuition told me it was reflux and as usual I was right!

Hospitals and sickness..YUCK!!

Happy Thursday to ya!!

It's good to be home! My little Emilee was hospilized from Sunday until yesterday morning for vomiting and severe dehydration and Strep! it took more then 2 bags of fluids to finally get her to pee. She is still having trouble keeping food down. This has been going on for 2 weeks now. The Drs say it's from the strep, but I think the strep was secondary. She was given the penicillin on Monday morning..4 days later she still having trouble??
While I was there walking the halls with Emilee I noticed some of the children there that were far worse off then she is! I am thankful and grateful to God that I have relatively healthy kids! It could always be worse!!

Happy St. Patrick's Day!!

Hello Friends,

Just checking in!! I wish you the luck of the Irish today!! I will be wearing my lucky Irish Flyers shirt tonight as they play Atlanta..Hope they win!!
Tomorrow the girls and I will be off to visit my Mom and Dad for the week..It seems like it was last weekend when we were there but it was 3 weeks ago!
I'll be sure to post some pictures!!