Light bulb Moments

You know them...the moments from out of no where you finally get "it". "It" could be many things. Most of my light bulb moments have been when I have experienced a loss of some kind. A loss of a loved one, a friend moving away, breaking up with a boyfriend..you get the picture..But I have to say these prolific moments have defined me as person..I learned not only what it is to love and to have lost but I also learned the VALUE of love and friendship.
One of those defining moments in my life happened almost 16 years ago..I had tried to kill myself with pills and was unsuccessful at it. I had been through a lot with the reprocussions of my actions and dealing with it all. I was confused and in a mental hell and was not sure of how to dig myself out of it. A member of the Rescue Squad that I belong to died of Malignant Melinoma shortly after my ordeal and as I was standing in the funeral home listening to his sister sing Amazing Grace it hit me like a ton of bricks...I ran out of the service, I couldn't breath, my friends Regan and Sam ran after me..There I sit on the ground sobbing realizing for the first time I was thankful to be alive..I was selfish for wanting to take the easy way out rather then work through my depression. Here I was ready to throw it all away when Scott tried so desperately to hold on to life and couldn't..
My most recent light bulb moment came about 6 months ago as I was typing an email to a friend asking for prayers, sobbing while trying to type..The very thing I was typing about..my relationship with my husband and the toll of his not working has put on our marriage "it" happened.. I heard a voice in my head say.."you are the one that needs to work right now, You are the one who needs to take charge of this family." A peace came over me and I knew my light bulb moments were actually God talking to me, giving me the insight that I needed at that moment..
Listen closely, listen with all your heart and He will speak to you.

Random Thoughts

Sitting here in the quiet of my apartment, listening to my playlist on the computer I have come to realize a few things..

Work would be so much better if I was truly happy going there.. I know exactly when I started to become this way..When I realized that I am under appreciated, under valued and under utilized!!

My children are the BEST thing that God has blessed me with.. I can never say enough thank you's for them:) You know they are from GOd when the Dr. says to you I can't believe you got pregnant!!

I love my husband very much...lately I feel unappreciated. I have been working my tail off the last few months to provide for our family...:you can get off the couch any minute now and do something:

My 38th birthday is rapidly drawing near...not sure how I feel about it. I would love this year to be the year that my dreams come true..

Emilee's First hair Cut

Emilee got her first hair cut yesterday and boy did she need it!! She was such a trooper and seemed to really enjoy the experience..

This is the before picture where she was getting her hair combed and wet..

And here is the starting of the hair cut:

And these are the final photos..and her hair is straight!! It looked great but really wierd at the same time since I have never seen her hair straight before. LOL

Such a Big Girl..

Happy Halloween!!!

It's a warm Halloween and cloudy..hopefully we wont get wet! LOL

Off to get ready, Faith is going as Aurora and Em is Uniqua from Backyardigans..

More to follow..

We are back from Trick or treating and got a little wet. It stayed warm too..the only time I had my jacket on was when it was sprinkling out.

Thankfully the weather held off until after we got home. Right now it pouring!!

This picture is of Emilee before we left. She did not want to put her costume on!! I had to take the hat off as soon as the picture was taken! LOL

This is outside our apartment..

In the car..ready to get candy!!!!!

Miss Faith with a big smile...she's got candy!!!

Miss Em just chillin' with her bag of candy and her cup. I asked her if she was comfy and I got a head shake yes..

And this...was a yard that both girls liked...something that is hard to find since both are scared to death of most Halloween stuff..

Happy halloween!!

Precious Words

Today when I got up Emilee come bounding through the bathroom door to give me the "your up kiss and hug"..when these precious words were said.." Hello Mom" I had tears in my eyes.. I have been waiting for those words to be said.. She's doing well with speech therapy and every day she says more words here and there..
I am so grateful that she's talking..

Faith Turns 7!!

I can't believe it myself but my little girl is 7! Her birthday was this past thursday and she was soooo excited! Daddy decided to take her to Applebee's and she had ice cream and everyone sang Happy Birthday!!
No pictures of this event however because Dad also forgot the camera but I did manage to take a shot or two of her opening her present..She got Birthday Pet Shops ...later in the week we went to the mall where she got the hanna Montana Build a Bear! And to top it off grandma bought her a giftcard for American Girl store so our next rip to New York she will be bringing home her doll!
Come to think of it she had more like a birthday week..MomMom took her out last Saturday and she went to a movie..Cloudy with a chance of Meatballs, dinner at Applebee's and shopping at Target where she got all the Hello kitty clothes they could find!!

Summer is over

and it feels like it never really began. I have been working so much this summer that I have missed ball games, a trip to WV, and swimming in the pool with the kids..and so much more.
To recap the summer highlights:
Faith was diagnosed with Dyspraxia..it's a processing disorder of the brain. The neurologist is hopeful that with therapy and extra help in math and reading she will be able to learn more easily.
Emilee started speech therapy and is saying more words here and there...she will be able to start all day preschool when she turns 3.
Bryan took the kids down to WV to see his Mom. The visit went very well and they had a nice time. I stayed home because of work..
We managed to getaway for two days to North Jersey to see Lucas play ball with the Tornadoes..we also went into my favorite city, New York and got to eat our favorite pizza and see Faith's favorite places..It was great to see Emilee's reaction to the city. It was like looking at with new eyes.
Faith started school before Labor day this year so baseball got cut short. The Tornadoes made it to the playoffs so Bryan took the girls and his Mom ( she came up for a visit for her Bday) to a game this past weekend and they swept the Jackals!! I am very happy for all the guys and am hopeful that they will win the title this year! Lucas is talking about retiring at the end of this year so this would be an awesome end to his baseball career.

Here is a picture of the Girls and our dear friend Lucas..Emilee LOVES him..He is one of the few men she will go to..